Being Vulnerable and Showing off the Messy Process

100 Things #025 - Get Started

Here we are! One quarter of the way through this project. Thank you for coming along on the journey. As usual, if you enjoy, share with a friend. Love seeing the growth we’ve got going!

Also, just to plug a little, my official writing account on my Instagram has also been picking up a bit of steam, so feel free to follow over there to see poetry, short stories, and to keep up with future projects!

Alright, enough of all that. On with the show!

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Photo by Ricardo Viana on Unsplash

I heard a piece of advice recently that’s really made an impact on my day-to-day life these last few weeks, so I feel like I should share it here. 

I think a common tendency among perfectionists is to stall progress on a given project until we feel like it’s “good enough to share.”

But what can often happen in these scenarios is that the bar is set too high, to an almost impossible-to-reach height, which indefinitely postpones the actual, most fulfilling part of working on something, which is getting to share it at all. 

I’ve already spoken about perfectionism a fair bit on here, but suffice it to say, that self-handicapping and procrastinating are high on the menu when it comes to perfectionist tactics. 

And as a self-proclaimed perfectionist who is just about sick of not getting to reap any of the rewards of working so hard to develop projects, the piece of advice that rocked my world was simply being told that I should “get going,” and that “getting good,” and “getting smart” can come later. 

Technically speaking, this advice came specifically in the form of indirect business coaching through a podcast by Ali Abdaal, but I believe that this mindset can be applied to just about anything that an individual is struggling to find it in them to finish due to perfectionist standards. 

It might be a creative project that you feel the world should only get to see when it’s at its best, most complete phase. Though, artists in that situation often run the risk of never finishing the project at all, due to procrastinating so long that the artistic vision and fervour fall to the wayside before it can be completed.

Or maybe it’s a resume that you’re polishing up before you begin to apply for jobs. Yet with quite literally millions of templates, guides, and tips on how to build the perfect resume, it can be a bit overwhelming to feel like the draft you have going will cut it. 

Though, what might help in this scenario is to just be satisfied with your second or third finished draft, apply to a few jobs, and iterate based on feedback. It may be better to throw your hat in the ring to begin sharpening your aim, rather than watching everyone else throw theirs while you risk losing out of a great job as a result of never trying.

Now, this isn’t to say that getting started is easy. It can take weeks, months, or even years of work to practice letting your guard down and being vulnerable to show people a version of yourself that hasn’t gone through the perfectionist ringer. 

But it’s much more fulfilling to regret starting and looking silly than to regret not starting at all.

Photo by Nadya Spetnitskaya on Unsplash

I remember once asking a therapist if there was a way I could practice this sort of vulnerability. His suggestion was so odd that I can’t help but remember it now years later. He suggested choosing a hobby that I enjoy, which at the time I had responded with baking bread, because who wasn’t baking like a fiend during the pandemic, and posting photos and videos on social media of the messy process of baking bread, rather than just showing off the finished product. 

My first thought was simply, “Well, that sounds dumb.” But a few years later, I see more now what he was going for, and I think it ties in with this idea of being vulnerable for the sake of letting that guard down.

We have to learn to accept that the first version of something doesn’t need to be a finished product.

Easier said than done, sure. But it’s important to think about what little steps you can take in the meantime to help move closer to the goal of digesting that advice completely. 

I’ll leave you here with a few journaling prompts for those who want to do a bit of guided thinking around this topic:

• When was the last time you delayed sharing or finishing a project because you felt it wasn't perfect? Describe the project and your feelings at that time.

• Think about a time when you felt proud of an imperfect effort or result. What made you feel proud despite the imperfections?

• Reflect on someone you admire who embraces imperfection in their work. How does their approach inspire you?

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Thanks for reading! If you have any thoughts, I’d love to hear them in the comments or send me an email.

For now, have a good week, and I’ll see you at 100.