Why It's Important to Be Vulnerable and Look Stupid Sometimes

100 Things #028 - Embarrass Yourself

Photo by Jonas Leupe on Unsplash

Everyone’s been there – you’re up in front of your crowd, ready to deliver that speech that you were told to prepare a little over a week ago, and the real fear starts to set in.

The fear isn’t just about what could go wrong, but what is going wrong.

Because, let’s face it, we’re all going to screw up from time to time, and doing it in front of people, especially strangers, is a tough stumble to recover from, but I believe it can be one of the most rewarding.

I believe those of us whose pride is maybe a little more inflated than the average person’s can especially attest, the feeling of needing to save face can be one of the most pressing priorities to keep reigns on from day to day.

Real-World vs. Online Standards

In an age of social media identity curation, the desire to put one’s best foot forward, despite how “facetuned” or artificially enhanced that foot may be, can be an overwhelming one. We’re not afforded the same luxuries in the real world to be able to perfectly draft, edit, or alter ourselves to anywhere near the same extent as can be done in the online space.

With increased pressure to present ourselves flawlessly and next to no change in the human ability to actually do so, it’s no wonder that levels of anxiety for these digital generations are at all-time highs.

The demand outweighs the supply, and it’s the modern person’s psyche that gets squeezed for the difference.

So what are we to do? Continue to work towards creating shortcuts or freeing up the schedule to have more time in the day for better curating our real-world selves?

Or is there an option to continue to work as a society to fight against unrealistic standards and normalize looking a little silly here and there when mistakes naturally happen?

And let’s be clear, it isn’t just those isolated moments when mistakes are being made that feel as though they’re under more heat than usual – it can often feel like we’re constantly being scrutinized, pressured to present our best selves, even when it might be perfectly fine to cut ourselves some slack.

Why do I care so much about what people will think if I wear sweatpants to run my errands?

Why does it bother me to imagine myself stumbling over my words while public speaking?

I would argue that these concerns, while no doubt a part of the typical human experience, are only exacerbated by the intense modern pressures placed on us by an overly curated online culture.

Conclusions

From beauty standards, to clothing choices, to general life proficiencies, I think it would be valuable for all of us to cut ourselves, and each other, a little bit of slack from time to time.

In a world where perfection is in short supply, it shouldn’t be controversial to say that we alone have the power to make up for the difference through patience and understanding.

I’ll leave you here with a few journaling prompts for those who want to do a bit of guided thinking around this topic:

• How does ego influence your fear of making mistakes? How can you balance pride with self-compassion?

• Think about your online presence versus your real-life self. How much effort do you put into curating your online identity?

• Describe a scenario where you felt pressured to present yourself perfectly. How did this pressure affect your behaviour and mental state? What strategies can you use to alleviate this pressure?

---

Thanks for reading! If you have any thoughts, I’d love to hear them in the comments below! Start a conversation – I’d be happy to respond!

And as a reminder, 100 Things is a totally free-to-read newsletter. Any subscriptions to my work here are simply a contribution to support me and my writing, and they mean the absolute world <3

I appreciate you all.

For now, have a good week, and I’ll see you at 100.